Sweet Stories of Silent Matsuno

By Liu Yurong

Back when I was just a poor, struggling student in Los Angeles, I couldn’t afford a car at all.Fortunately for me, one of my classmates introduced me to Matsuno—the man with the keys to a car…and my heart.

Reticent but Attentive

He really felt for me. Come rain or shine, he was there for me driving me around four times a day so that I could read and work without any unnecessary burdens. It was like me having an own private chauffeur.

Unfortunately, it didn’t last long. Within three months, I got terribly ill. The doctor diagnosed me with mild pneumonia. I lay in bed in a daze with a high fever and couldn’t get out of bed for at least two weeks. Matsuno was right there taking care of me,serving me soup and medicine and making food for me. My parents and children were not around, I was alone, poor and sick, and desperate. Had I not met this quiet, diligent and meticulous Japanese American who worked tirelessly without complaint, I might have died in a foreign land.

Matsuno’s parents were born in the United States,so he is a third generation Japanese-American,and the eldest of five siblings. Due to his natural shyness, he had not really been in love till in his late thirties. With his Doctor of Pharmacy degree from the University of Southern California (USC), he has especially high income. Lying on the sickbed, I looked at his massive back when a thought crossed my mind—maybe he’s the man for me? Soon after I got well, we quietly registered for marriage at the local town chapel, and I have been Mrs. Matsuno for more than 20 years.

憨厚洋丈夫

文/刘於蓉

在洛杉矶，当年只是一个穷学生的我根本无力养一部车子，幸好同学介绍我认识了他——松野。

寡言却细致

他对我的处境十分同情，工作之余，一天四次开车接送我，风雨无阻，让我能像雇用了私人专职司机一样，安心地读书和工作。

可惜好景不长，不到三个月，我就累病了，又得了风寒，医生诊断我感染了轻度肺炎。我躺在床上，高烧不退，至少有两个星期迷迷糊糊地起不了床。松野衣不解带地照顾我，伺候我喝汤药，喂我吃饭。父母、孩子都不在身边，我形单影只，贫病无依，若不是上苍让我遇见这个沉默寡言、任劳任怨、无微不至的日裔美国人，可能我会客死异乡。

松野的父母都出生在美国，他是第三代日裔美国人，五个兄弟姐妹中他排行老大，因为天性羞涩，三十七八岁还没真正谈过恋爱。他学有专长，是南加州大学（USC）毕业的药剂学博士，有一份很好的收入。躺在病床上养病时，我望着他厚实的背影想了又想，觉得嫁给他不算太委屈。病愈不久，我们悄悄地到镇上的小教堂注册成婚，就这样，我做了二十多年的松野太太。

婚后，两人日夜生活在一起，唇齿相依，互相适应外，也免不了发生摩擦。开头的十年，我常怀疑自己的选择。他是标准的坐如钟、立如松，不但动作慢，反应迟缓，而且坚信“沉默是金”，可以一整天不说一句话，造成我精神上的极大苦闷。我怀疑，这个土生土长的美国人，骨子里是不是仍然潜伏着日本式大男子主义的毒素？

随着年龄的增长，我渐渐学会凡事退一步想，以旁观者的立场观察自己的先生和这段婚姻。

憨直又真诚

我必须承认自己与他有缘。我做梦也想不到我会来到美国嫁给一个日裔美国人。他身高将近六尺，体重260磅，比我整整重了120磅，宽脸上还横着两道巨大的浓眉。

After marriage, both of us have lived together day and night. We’re like two peas in a pod. We’ve adapted to each other swimmingly, but that doesn’t mean we don’t have our moments of friction. In the first ten years,I often doubted my choice. He is such an average guy, who sits like a stone and stands like a pillar.He is slow to act and react, and he believes that “silence is golden.”Sometimes it could nearly freak me out that he kept silent without saying a single word for a whole day. I sit there wondering if this sweet, mild-mannered American citizen is still a Japanese male chauvinist at heart.

As I’ve grown older, I’ve gradually learned to take a step back and observe my husband and our marriage from an objective perspective.

Honest and Sincere

I must admit that I have a lot in common with him. I have never dreamed that I would come to America and marry a Japanese-American. He is nearly six feet tall and weighs 260 pounds, 120 pounds heavier than me. His huge bushy eyebrows spreading across his broad face almost make him a centerfold from the book of Japanese clichés.

Silent Matsuno had no sense of humor, but his simple nature gives him a sort of naïve charm.During her lifetime, my mother loved him so much and used to make him talk.

My mother died of illness in the United States. Before her burial, her children knelt with the monks and chanted prayers for her. While chanting together with us, unexpectedly, Matsuno fell asleep with his hands clasped together, still on his knees and mumbling “Amitabha” in an almost undiscernible prayer. I didn’t have the heart to criticize his gaffes seeing he didn’t complain about being tired and his filial piety was commendable.Every morning I light incense and worship the bodhisattva of Kuanyin (Goddess of Mercy).When I read a Buddhist sutra, he also silently recites, “Bodhisattva blesses me and my family.”Over these years, maybe the Bodhisattvas can also appreciate his honesty and sincerity and bless us.

He firmly believes that “a man does not easily shed tears,” but he does not understand that “a man has gold at his knees.” When I scold my daughters in anger, he and the children often go down on their knees to make amends,which leaves me kicking myself that I’m always so temperamental and making up my mind to change.

Simple and Loving

Matsuno loves my children so much. To help with their study,and car loans, he works tirelessly and takes part-time jobs. Yet he’s such a trooper that he never utters a word of complaint.

When my younger daughter graduated from medical college and was applying for her medical license, her scholarships and student loan checks all stopped,leaving her unable to meet her living expenses, insurance premiums and car payments. As her stingy mother, I tried to treat it lightly by saying, “She’s old enough that she should take care of this on her own.”

However, as luck would have it, her big-hearted old step-father said solemnly, “If you do not pay,I’ll pay. I go to find another parttime job…”

沉默的松野虽无幽默感，单纯的天性却使他显得憨态可掬。我的母亲生前很疼他，常逗他开金口说说话。

母亲在美国不幸病逝，安葬前，子女们环跪灵前，随着僧人为她老人家诵经。想不到，松野学我们双手合十喃喃念着“阿弥陀佛”时，居然睡着了，而且“金刚不倒”，依旧跪得好好的。我念在他不喊累，孝心可嘉，也就不忍心苛责他的失态。每日清晨，我点香膜拜观世音菩萨，念一段佛经时，他也在旁默念着：“菩萨保佑我，菩萨保佑我的家。”数年如一日，菩萨也能体会到他的憨直与真诚而保佑我们。

他坚信“男儿有泪不轻弹”，但他不懂“男儿膝下有黄金”。每当我生气责骂女儿时，他和孩子们常一起下跪赔不是，令我对自己的坏脾气羞惭得无地自容，想不改也不成。

单纯又博爱

松野极爱我的孩子。为了两个孩子念书、买车子，他努力工作又兼差，从不吐一句怨言。

小女儿从医学院毕业，准备考医师执照，学校的奖学金、政府的学生贷款全部停止，生活费、保险费、车子贷款全没着落，身为亲娘的我轻描淡写地说：“她这么大了，应该自己去想办法。”

想不到，仅是继父的他脸色一正，说：“你不付，我付，我再去找一份兼差……”

唉，他本是个高尔夫迷，但现在每天必须上班挣钱养家，一点打球的时间都没有。自从我结束自己的生意后，他毫无怨言地独立挑起养家的重担。和我的两个孩子在一起生活二十年，他完全不介意孩子们仍旧沿用生父的中国姓而没有改姓松野。在美国社会，养育前妻或前夫所生子女的例子非常多，但像他这样真情实意、死心塌地爱护孩子的继父，我相信不但在美国，就是全天下也很难找到。他没念过中国古圣贤书，却懂得并且身体力行“幼吾幼以及人之幼”的博爱精神，我为两个早已失去父爱的女儿庆幸。（摘自《人生舞台在美国》中国文联出版社）

He used to be a golfer, but now he has to work every day to earn enough money to support our family, with no more time to play. Since I finished my business, he has shouldered the burden of supporting the family without complaint. Living with my two children for 20 years, he never minds that the children are still using their biological father’s Chinese surname without changing it into Matsuno. In American society, there are many examples of raising children from their ex-wife or ex-husband, but a stepfather like him, someone who truly and affectionately loves and cares for his children, I believe, is hard to find not only in the United States, but also in the whole world. He has never read any of China’s ancient books of wisdom,but he understands and practices the humanity spirit of “extending the same care to others’ children as if they are his own children.” I am grateful for my two daughters who have lost their father’s love long before and found paternal love again in Matsuno.

(FromLife Is Like a Stage in America, China Federation of Literary and Art Circles Publishing House. Translation:Qing Run)