恋爱不是游戏Love Shouldn’t Be a Game

庐隐/文　蔡力坚/译

没有在浮沉的人海中翻过筋斗的和尚，不能算善知识；没有受过恋爱洗礼的人生，不能算真人生。

A monk who has never done somersaults and sustained bruises in the mortal world cannot aspire to be a spiritual leader. A person who has never tasted the joy and pain of love is in no position to profess to be living a full life.

和尚最大的努力，是否认现世而求未来的涅槃，但他若不曾了解现世，他又怎能勘破现世，而跳出三界外呢？

Monks seek ultimate liberation and happiness—or nirvana in Buddhist parlance1—in a future life by shielding themselves from any earthly temptations. But if they are cocooned in a bubble， how can they see through the vacuity of worldly pursuits and find transcendence2？

而戀爱是人类生活的中心，孟子说：“食色性也。”所谓恋爱正是天赋之本能，如一生不了解恋爱的人，他又何能了解整个人生？

Romantic relationships are a core building block of human experience. Our yearnings for food and sex are， as Mencius claimed， inherently conditioned. If you are alien to romantic love， how can you possibly grasp the full meaning of life？

所以凡事都从学习而知而能，只有恋爱用不着学习，只要到了相当的年龄，碰到合式（适）的机会，他和她便会莫名其妙地恋爱起来。

While all knowledge and skills are acquired through a learning process， love is engendered spontaneously. At a right age and at the right moment， a boy and a girl will click3 if the right chemistry4 is there.

恋爱人人都会，可是不见得人人都懂，世俗大半以性欲伪充恋爱，以游戏的态度处置恋爱，于是我们时刻可看到因恋爱而不幸的记载。

Everyone is supposed to be capable of love. But not everyone understands love. Too often， sex masquerades as love， and love is seen as a game. As a result， relationships often end on a sad note.

实在的恋爱绝不是游戏，也绝不是堕落的人生所能体验出其价值的，它具有引人向上的鞭策力，它也具有伟大无私的至上情操，它更是美丽的象征。

Love should never be a game. Inaccessible to a depraved mind， love uplifts our spirits and inspires us to reach greater heights. Informed5 by selflessness and nobility， it symbolizes beauty.

在一双男女正纯洁热爱着的时候，他和她内心充实着惊人的力量；他们的灵魂是从万有的束缚中得到了自由，不怕威胁，不为利诱，他们是超越了现实，而创造他们理想的乐园。

When a man and a woman are deeply in love， the wellspring of true love provides an amazingly inexhaustible source of inner strength. It delivers them of all emotional shackles， defends them against threats， and enables them to fend off temptations. They are thus able to transcend reality and build a happy future.

不幸物欲充塞的现世界，这种恋爱的光辉，有如萤火之微弱，而且“恋爱”有时会成为无知男女堕落之阶，使维纳斯不禁深深地叹息：“自从世界人群趋向灭亡之途，恋爱变成了游戏，哀哉！”

In today’s materialistic world， however， the fire of love has dimmed， like a flickering firefly. Morally decadent behaviors6 are sometimes touted under the guise of the pursuit of love to trap unwitting men and women. Much to the chagrin of Venus， the goddess of love， love is increasingly becoming a game as the world is heading down the path to destruction. It’s sad！

1“涅槃”为佛教用语，意思是实现自我解放、达到超脱一切烦恼的精神境界，是梵语nirvana的音译。“涅槃”在中文里直接使用似乎问题不大，一般人能知道其含义，但了解nirvana的概念的人不多，所以似有必要对其含义略加解释。  2佛教所说三界，是指欲界、色界、无色界。唯有跳出三界外，才算三业清净，烦恼诸垢皆已净尽，也就是transcendence，即experience beyond the normal or physical level。

3 click的意思是quickly become friendly or intimate，在此上下文里可以做“爱恋”解释。类似用法如：I didn’t meet a woman who I really clicked with until I was 40.  4 chemistry是指a strong mutual attraction。  5 inform义为give an essential quality to，类似的用法如：His Catholic upbringing informs his writing.  6 原文里的“恋爱”是带引号的，所以可以被理解为morally decadent behaviors。